So this is my new diet and fitness blog. The reasoning behind it is simple. I’m forty five years old, incredibly overweight and even more unfit. Having moved to working at home three days a week, my already sedentary lifestyle has become almost comatose. Sitting at the computer, moving only to visit the toilet or make a cup of tea does not make for a healthy lifestyle, especially when the only other exercise I now get (having stopped working in the pub where at least I was walking a lot) is the stroll to and from the bus stop on work days. It is abundantly clear that changes need to be made before I either turn into one of those people in the freaky dieting shows on the telly or die of some nasty weight/unfitness related illness.

To this end I have joined a gym to improve my fitness and am about to embark on the latest attempt to lose weight through a new eating regime (I don’t want to say the ‘D’ word as I think it’s rather negative). As I chronicle my journey to greater fitness, better health and weight loss there will be daily posts as I think this will help to keep me focussed and hopefully help me to stick to the plan during the bad times I know lie ahead. I intend it to be honest as I need to acknowledge my weaknesses and fails as well as my good progress, which could be painful, but will hopefully, eventually be cathartic and helpful.

Sunday, 6 November 2011

Day Sixty


So I think it’s time to admit something I’ve been trying to get my head around for a few days.

I’m having a really big problem with food right now.

Although I have a fridge and freezer full of meat and vegetables I’m finding it harder and harder to find something I WANT to eat. Every day is turning into a battle and it’s beginning to get me down. It’s also making it harder for me to stick to this way of eating as I consider ‘forbidden’ foods in an attempt to find something I want to eat (although being honest there’s not much I’m considering there either).

I suspect that partially the problem is that I’ve been eating pretty much the same thing for two months now and I need a change. However, with my dislike of cooking unless I’m really in the mood, and with my sometimes finicky tastes in food it’s not that easy to find new things to eat that are low in carbs.

I have always been a carnivore and a meal really isn’t a meal to me unless it contains some meat or fish – I don’t really do vegetarian options. Since the weather has started to get cooler I’m finding it harder to eat salad, as this has always been a summer food for me. But the range of vegetables that I can safely eat on phase one is rather limited, especially once you remove all the stuff I don’t like and I’ve discovered that there’s only so many meals you can have the using the same mangetout/broccoli /asparagus/green beans/ courgette/cabbage mix without becoming sick of it. There is, of course, that good old standby eggs and bacon, but even that gets boring after a few days and there is a need for ‘green’ carbs rather than just protein and fat based carbs, so it’s also not ideal. The same problem also applies to my usual grab foods, ham, cheese and prosciutto.

It doesn’t help that I’m generally not feeling very hungry these days anyway (I guess 4  (ish) litres of water a day will do that to you), but my appetite is being suppressed further by lack of desire for any of the food I currently own.

There is a knock on effect to this. The food that I’m not eating is obviously going out of date and in the case of the salad and vegetables it goes all mushy and starts to rot. Normally I don’t have a problem dealing with old food, just throwing it away and buying some more, but at the moment I can’t face eating lettuce because a few days ago I threw out a bag that had gone all limp and slimy and all I can think of is that. It doesn’t matter that the current stuff is fine; it’s not, in my brain. And since the problem with the woody and undercooked vegetables the other day I just can’t bring myself to eat any more of them either.     

And so that brings me onto the protein shakes. Although they’re fine within this way of eating, are very low in carbs and are good for exercising too, since I’ve begun drinking the flavoured ones (as I think I worried about before I ordered them) I’ve become addicted to them. To the extent, in fact, that at the moment I’d seriously give up eating anything else at all pretty much just to drink them instead.

This is obviously not good for a million reasons, but I’m not quite sure how I can change my mindset and get back on track. It may be that I just need to go completely off-track for a few days to shock me back into low carbing, but I don’t really want to do that either as I’m having enough trouble losing weight already without deliberately sabotaging it.

So far today I’ve had some smoked salmon with cream cheese and several glasses of water. I will be having a protein shake at some point and, maybe as my carbs are so low today, a yoghurt – both of which I can just about stomach. I obviously should be eating something proper, but at the moment I just can’t think of anything that I can really face eating.

Today’s exercise:  A bit of housework
Carb's Eaten: 13.9G (at 7pm)
Exercising to: Lie To Me and NCIS
Weight Loss = 1 stone and 2 pounds
Inch Loss = 12.5 inches
Mood: Worried

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